Metastatic Journey: My encounter with Stage 4 Breast Cancer

 I found out I had cancer the first time four years ago while sitting in the Dairy Queen parking lot eating an ice cream cone.  I decided to check results in My Chart while I was taking a snack break in between errands. “Malignant Neoplasm of the Left Breast” Wait, What? I immediately called The breast clinic and they told me someone would give me a call back shortly.  Within 10 minutes I had a care coordinator on the line giving me all kinds of next step information.  I would have a team of 3 oncologists, one main medical oncologist, a radiation oncologist, and a surgeon.  Appointments would be popping up within days to make a game plan.  That time, I went with a lumpectomy followed by 16-20 rounds of radiation.  The exact number escapes me now.  Everything functioned like a well oiled machine.  I met my team, was given a binder with all kinds of information on my type of cancer, treatment options, what to expect, who to call when and for what…everything was laid out for me.  I felt s

When smacked in the face with your own mortality you start doing a lot of thinking.  I have been going over my life and shaking my head at some of the decisions I made along the way and applauding myself for others.  We do what we can with what we have at the time.  I always had good intentions, sometimes my own naive young mind got me on the wrong path, sometimes it was my alcoholism, and sometimes I was just foolish. But all those experiences, the good and the bad made me who I am right now.   So many memories have started coming back to me. Not sure if that is just what happens with a diagnosis such as this or if my slower pace of living, gives my brain time to remember.   I can remember the smell of my grandma Inez’s house.  I remember her cupboards and how they smelled of wood varnish. I remember her baking what seemed like endless apple pies from scratch using apples off her backyard tree.  I remember my aunt Melanie’s room like I was just there yesterday.  It was my favorite roo